How to Help Your Man Beat Depression

In the current climate, unemployment is soaring, businesses are failing and closing, and government
economists are predicting more gloom for many months.
While many people are being made redundant across the entire spectrum of industries, a greater ratio
of men than women are finding themselves on the scrapheap.
Historically, men have been the household breadwinners. In the 21st century, the distinctive gender
roles have become a little more fuzzy, but on the whole, in a typical family, men work full time,
women work full or part time, and women still run the household and raise the children.
So when a middle aged man loses his job due to a debt ridden company going into decline, or because
he is seen as expendable, the fragile male ego can take a beating, and your man could well spiral
into mental and physical decline.

Most women would be very sympathetic at first. But men in this position tend to do very little about
looking for another job, or do next to nothing to help around the house. If a woman works full time,
and then comes home to find her partner moping in the same position she left him earlier, things
could become a little difficult.

Women need to just take a small step backwards, and look at his situation. More often than not, it
is easier said than done, but in truth, he is probably suffering from clinical depression.

The male identity is hugely connected to work, status at work, and his power within the workplace, not
to mention the kameraderie of teamwork, and the overall feeling of being part of something good.
Redundancy can take away all these good feelings and make him feel completely hopeless. Needless to
say, a full time working woman would be driven completely crazy by his poor attitude.

So the last thing to do is to moan and whine. Instead, try to set him small goals, and praise him
each time he achieves them. A calm and measured 'thank you' for completing a small task will do
wonders for his self esteem. Also, encourage him to take up a hobby, or hone a skill that he has
always wanted to have a go at. Golf is not a good idea, as it is expensive, and you would probably
never see him!

Anger with a man who is depressed is very understandable, but never a great idea. Men are usually
very poor at expressing how they feel, so he may not even recognise that he has a problem. Anger,
shouting, and confrontation will probably not even register, he will merely see you complaining at
him. Remember that your man is feeling like the world has collapsed around him. He does not want you
to baby him, or mother him - he just doesn't know that he cannot rebuild himself on his own.

In severe cases, some men find it difficult to get out of the house, as they feel intimidated by
people who still have jobs, those with better cars, and bigger houses. They may even feel totally
intimidated by their partner, being female, still working, and now earning more money than him.
In these cases, it is important to remember that your man is ill, that he needs your help and
support, and that he will never fully recover without it.

Sandy Francis is a recently retired sportsman, who now dedicates his time to his original vocation of writing. His latest website at http://www.dubbletake.110mb.com features articles and solutions on health, fitness, diet and wellbeing.